night

   When I first started getting into the internet as we know it today I was obsessed with collecting data and dividing it. Any movie I enjoyed, I had to download it. Any image from a search engine related to something I liked or from an image board if even in the loosest way possible. But as I got older, started running out of space, and realizing how infinite data is I stopped doing so, keeping only what I had use of at the click of a button. A single 1 TB could store a single image copied any number of times or copied and slightly altered with each copy and be filled eventually. This image can somehow be bloated past 100 MB's or more. What if the drive breaks? Concepts like this and the amount of formats available used that can hold identical or nearly so data made me wonder what the actual value is in hoarding data, personally I feel it's something for a network of machines building an archive of everything available on any network ever, updated by the minute, and accessible to anyone but to the average user if this is not strictly personalized and put into divided folders then without a constantly updated whole it's just going to be a mess. There's satisfaction to be found in that for the user who over time puts effort and backs up what their personal archive is and by putting it on the internet can even contribute to the satisfaction of others. Yet in order for mass gathering and availability to occur someone needs to make that system and pay for that hardware. We archive to satisfy and possibly leave something behind but a machine only does what it needs to at the hands of the programmer. It doesn't care about what content it carries, it doesn't care if this is the same image with a different file name, nor does it care what anyone thinks about said content. It simply gathers and gives at the will of the creator. Since this is still human will at work and nothing is going to do something like this on it's own and many of us hold the desire to be like this machine, what does this say about us? What about how someone doing something just to know the feeling of it? This is not just computer data but data on the outside too unable to be completely inputted into a system as complete as experienced. We have a strong desire to know, sometimes for not much of a reason at all and keep it with us and we do at some level. I believe this is key to understanding part of our purpose as we exist now, we gather and each in our own unique way. Two people may look at the same picture and see something entirely different creating a difference in the data of that experience in connection to that photo. Something was created on both ends and the more people that see it the more will be created, the same two people can look at it a different time and get different results to. What is storing this though specifically? Everything that occurs is not useless and has some sort of splash effect but we can't always observe it, this occurs outside of the subconscious but as a result of it often. What would any sort of events be without memory? Something that occurred, this memory does not need to be anything we would view as significant but our source appears to need it and we are the extension that has been given amnesia just to get it all. This is the nature of things that occur, things done to learn for no purpose in particular. Sometimes we as conscious beings use it but otherwise there is no reason but that there is nothing left to do. If god is everything than it's up to it's own unavoidable movement to organize itself continually and create within it. This has no limits that can be reached and the individual is able to do anything to contribute. What is done individually should be done in value to you with learning in mind knowing that even when this life is lost nothing will be that has previously happened. Technology to grasp more and make available data from our own species on our own networks a file at a time is only an extension of what we were created under but our biology has limits. Limits resulting in interesting functions in themselves but still begging the question of what will happen when we can no longer handle our technology to gather and progress further? This is already occurring under the surface, so many falling ill and dying due to radiation from our own devices from the wifi router to the cell phone. To go back to health would be to either destroy or lessen these technologies effect on our biology but this would leave us with little other options and our brains can only learn so much, so fast especially in specific contexts. A single book can take over a week but a machine can scan and analyze the content in possibly less than an hour. This struggle itself creates only more data but the bigger question is now knowing this is what is the most authentic and valuable way to live and progress as both individuals and as a whole with everything else? What will satisfy but also allow the most variety? 

Day

  When I'm in a car going somewhere further than I normally walk I tend to take interest in the sidewalks between places or the narrow strip of road that can barely be called one in relation to where I'm going. Usually the store or going somewhere to eat offers a manufactured modern comfort with many ways to enjoy it yet you're bombarded with products offering something natural with connections to a place you would find outside the dull streets outside or even in terms of a certain grocery store organic. Things from outside at some point in direct connection with a natural aspect of our world largely untouched by humans given through means far less so. From my experience as a walker unable to drive myself what is felt that is most vibrant on the outside without any forced pleasure of sight, sound, or touch are isolated aspects of sensory input  from things experienced. Things that occupy my mind and bridge gaps where there's nothing but concrete and cold air, it gives this vague area life I can use so that I don't stop moving. Without this there is nothing but input and the absence of self is uncomfortable. There's nothing to do, nothing to say, and nowhere to go. Anything that is felt is the final answer, that's all there is presently from where the point of observance is. But these places to go and what they offer is catering to an addiction we need to thrive, the addiction to comfortably experience the whole of our own world brought to us in a way we can appreciate with our senses. Many will walk into a grocery store and buy organic produce to cook later, they possibly been to a store of ready made products before or simply enjoyed the night sky from the comfort of a vehicle or the parking lot itself. Maybe it was a restaurant where they were served exotic food and this bond with the area they were outside of this experience has now been interconnected with the essence of the location outside allowing the aspects of of it to be felt as an extension of the related restaurants focus that happens to be less industrialized. With this they may feel motivated and healthy with a more open perception in attention to details of the world around them but they didn't make these things they used, they didn't contribute to their harvest. They only spent some money and moved somewhere in a position to observe what they did and how they did. Nothing had to occur but the experience of connection through a separated piece of another location's product where it's unlike the cold streets outside and there is more nature to enjoy the openness of that happens to share aspects of what is outside of this place. We seem to learn the easiest from the handicap of natural comfort we normally would not have access to so consistently in places we feel the most comfort in given the state of mind and body is ready. From here we are able to experience the gifts of creation given there is comfort with room for growth of awareness that may eventually lead to less need and more of an understanding or what makes us happy as more training wheels on the consciousness are able to be removed. When someone has moved on there is no reason to return to anything but only to review. I see this addiction as unavoidable as the root of it is the fragility of flesh and the way information is processed. We come back to everything we do because there is something we are subconsciously processing to use permanently to experience more when there is nothing to experience. Less is always everything that isn't specific but integration and filters need to be more open or entirely removed and with that what we feel is us. No one drops that, so this is why longing occurs. Losing this results in dysfunction of the body and mind but allows life to be experienced through any sensation. This is what we need as a whole but this will also destroy everything as is in our current state of being. With this said I can only guess that this life is meant to gather a specific set of information from a certain base of observance and interaction to use for something else and we are using the disposable vessels made for it to be sacrificed for this but the mercy relies on our ability to further learn and thrive if a way is found through this. Addiction is the nature of conscious life and it's purpose that allows connection and variety, but to overcome addiction would be to abandon life to a large extent physically if not entirely.